Daily Supports

Daily Supports

Support takes many different forms.  Support can be physical, practical, or emotional. To sum up the term support, support is any type of assistance.  Support can come from a thing, person, or animal. In my life I receive multiple forms of support from multiple sources daily.  

All types of support are important for functioning, but I believe emotional support is the most important. In my daily life, I receive emotional support from my husband, family and friends.  I categorize emotional support as any help given toward my emotions.  For example, if I am angry, someone from my emotional support group will demonstrate support by listening to me vent, giving me advice, or distracting me with a fun activity. When I am upset, they give me a hug, offer me a shoulder to cry on, or give a listening ear.  People from my support group emotionally support me by building up my self-esteem.  They focus on my positive attributes with kind words and physical affection.  For example, my husband will give me a kiss and tell me I look nice in the morning prior to going to work or my friends will tell me I have good ideas and advice in conversation.  I agree with the saying, “all you need is love”.  Having people on your side as your daily cheerleaders and people you trust to help you get through the difficult times are priceless.  My emotional support gives me a sense of purpose in life. Without a sense of purpose or direction, I would question my daily actions and decisions.  I believe everyone has a purpose in life and the purpose is driven by emotion. Without emotion, what is the point of doing anything? 

Practical support is important for convenience and practical uses. In my daily life I have a lot of practical support, whether is at my home, work, or school. I have a car that helps me get from place to place.  At work I have pens, paper, notepads, file folders, desk, chairs, etc. to help complete tasks in order for the center to run.  My computer gives me practical support to go to school at an online university.   I have multiple appliances within my house that support my daily living functions.  For example, a stove top to cook with, a refrigerator to keep my food cold, a washer and drier to clean my clothes, a shower to stay clean, lights to see, and many more. Although I am extremely grateful for all of my daily practical support, it is feasible to live without the practical support.  During the Stone Age, people lived without the practical support I previously listed. They relied on natural resources for practical support.  During this era, I would have to change my lifestyle completely and live extremely minimalistic in order to function only on natural resources. Practical support is only necessary to live a certain lifestyle not to live. 

I view physical support as support that helps me physically.  Food, water and shelter are needed to physically support me daily.  If I do not eat, drink water, or have shelter for protection I will die.  

A challenge I may face in my daily life could be my car breaking down on my way to work.  I would need support from all areas of my life. I would need emotional support from my friends and family.  I may be frustrated or upset with the situation I was put in and I would rely on my emotional support group to keep me calm and get me through the process.  I would also need emotional support from my co-workers/families when arriving to work.  They would need to support me and be understanding of the situation.  I would need physical help as well.  I would either need someone to pick me up physically and drive me to work or a source of public transportation.  Some practical support I would need is from a cell phone to call my center to let them know why I have not arrived to work, to call a tow truck service to remove me car, to call someone to come pick me up and take me to my destination.   When I take a step back to reflect on all of the different types of support I receive daily it is overwhelming.  I rely on many people and many things to get me through my day.

My Connections to Play

Albert Einstein said, “Play is the highest form of research”. When you play you are completely enthralled in the activity.  Your imagination and creativity is running wild.  When your creativity is present, you start to investigate, create, innovate, and research other entities you may not have done so if you were present in a more constricted environment.  I believe as a child, a lot of my play was researching.  One of the main ways my parents liked to play with us was to go on adventures.  I remember as a child just getting in the car and having no idea where we were going or what we were doing, nor did my parents. During the car rides, if we saw something cool we would stop to investigate.  Many times these car rides lead to us learning about something new and researching about a topic more.  Sometimes that would lead us to playing with new games or new things.  For example, one time we took a ride and my brother spotted a cow farm.  The farm ended up being a milking farm. My family learned how to milk cows and make butter.  For several weeks following this adventure, my brother and I pretended to be farmers.  This lead to an obsession and we learned more and more facts about farming and agriculture through playing.  Whether my family took a nature walk, bike ride, trip to the fair, trip to the park, played a friendly game (board or sport), or crafted there was always an element of research involved.     

Almon (2002) says, “Play helps children weave together all the elements of life as they experience it” (p. 1).  One of my favorite toys to play with as a child was Barbie’s.   My childhood friend and I would role play with the Barbie’s different elements in our life we were experiencing at the time. We would create these elaborate story lines before playing about what conflict the Barbie’s would have to resolve and discuss the characteristics of their lives.  Some of the elements discussed were peer pressure, popularity, adolescence, friendship, puberty, love, family, sibling revelry, support, etc.  There was always an element of truth to the scenarios we played out for our Barbie’s.  Whatever we were experiencing in our life, we had our Barbie’s play it out.  I remember we also used them to relate to people.  Sometimes we would make our Barbie’s be poor or had their parents going through a divorce.  Although this was not our reality, this was an element of life we were trying to understand as a child.  We also used our Barbie’s to fanaticize about our life as an adult, the careers, family structure, economics etc.  Barbie’s were a therapeutic toy for me looking back on it now. 

As stated before my parents were very supportive of play.  They were active in our lives and enjoyed playing with us.  Other than taking us on adventures, my parent’s participated in a lot of physical play and games with us.  We played many sports as a family.  We took many bike rides and went on nature walks as a family.  We also had game night every Friday where we would play 2-3 board or card games.  I do not recall what my life was like when I was in daycare, therefore I cannot remember the relationship I had with play.  In school, I went to a traditional public elementary school.  The key memories I have of activities I enjoyed in school or of my favorite teachers were of teachers who supported play within the curriculum.  I have distinct memories of my first and fifth grade teacher.  I remember in first grade feeling like school was not work. It was too much fun to be work.  My fifth grade teacher allowed us to use our imagination and creativity a lot.  We did a lot of group projects as a class.  A couple of activities that stick out in my mind were writing a classroom song for the school talent show and playing store.  During one lesson we invented our own item to sale.  We made the items and priced them ourselves. Then we played store to learn about profit, losses, consumers, etc. My good memories of school from childhood are of those who supported play.  

I think the concept of play is still the same for youth now as it was for me when I was a child.  The concept of play is something self chosen by the child that brings enjoyment to them.  I feel the application of play is different in children now-a-days.  Technology has changed the way the youth plays.  When I observe my parents who have children, the first thing the children asks to do when they get home from school is to play video games.  As a child, I was outside 24/7.  There came a time my parents had to put a time limit on dinner because my brother and I were rushing through our meal to get back outside to play.  When I was a teacher, I remember parents telling me their children were rewarded for good behavior or good grades with time to play on the Wii or X-box.  There reward was not to play outside or go to the park, as it was when I was a child.  

Technology has also changed the parent’s way of thinking.  Parents do not seem to encourage their children to go outside.  Many parents give their child an I-pad with a game on it to entertain their child instead of taking the time to play a board game with them.  The other day, a friend of mine took their children on a hike and their kids said to them after the hike, “this was so much fun, why don’t we do stuff like this more often”.  Therefore, children still crave the same type of play that was present when I was young but technology has changed society.  Today’s youth play video games and games on tablets for entertainment.  Is apparent today’s youth are becoming more violent due to the amount of video games and TV shows they are exposed to.  I also feel technology is taking away from children’s creativity and imagination.   When I was a child, we would build forts with blankets.  Now there are apps where you can create your own world on a tablet or phone.  It is sad to observe today’s youth become more and more obsessed with technology.  Technology definitely has its purpose and benefits in this world, but when it comes to children, I believe taking the technology away will enhance today’s youth’s health, relationships, social skills, and creativity/imagination.  

Play as a child was pure enjoyment.  I know my parents taught me the concept of responsibility at a young age.  I was not allowed to play until all of my homework was complete or my chores were done.  In elementary school, I started to view play as a reward for my hard work.  This is the role play still has in my life as an adult.  The difference in my adult life is I understand the value of play.  When I was a child it was just fun so I wanted to do it.  As an adult you have more responsibilities and have to prioritize all of your task and objectives in a given day.  I understand I must be responsible and go to work, even if I want to just play.  As a child I did not understand the value of work, although my parents were trying to instill the concept of responsibility in me. As an adult, play and work balance each other out.  I cannot be successful in one without the other.  I cannot play all day without working because I would not have the means to support my play habits.  This is also vice versa, I could not work all the time without playing because I would become burnt out and have too much stress.  Play is a stress reliever as an adult.  Play is also an essential part of maintaining relationships I have as an adult.  I have to make the time to enjoy activities with my friends, husband and family.  Almon (2002) says “creative play is a central activity in the lives of healthy children” (p. 1).  I believe play needs to be a central activity for anyone to have a healthy life. 

References

Almon, K. (2002). The vital role of play in early childhood education. Gateways, 43. Retrieved from http://www.waldorfresearchinstitute.org/pdf/BAPlayAlmon.pdf

EDUC 6161- Relationship Reflection

Relationship Reflection

Relationships are not tangible.  You cannot buy a relationship, nor are just given a relationship.  I believe relationships are the one thing in life that you have to work for and continually need to work on.  Due to the amount of work that goes into creating and sustaining relationships, a relationship holds the highest importance in my life. There is nothing else in life more meaningful or satisfying than positive relationships, which ultimately blossom into partnerships.

There are multiple relationships that are important to me in my life.  In order for me to constitute a relationship as “important”, the relationship has to impact me, the relationship has to cause me to reflect upon myself, and it has to change and mold who I am as a person for the better. My parents, husband, and closest girlfriends are the most important relationships that come to mind.  I would actually consider these relationships as partnerships.   

An important relationship that may be out of the normal for most people was the relationship I had with my former supervisor of six years.  I met her when I was 22 years old.  I had experience working with children (tutoring, babysitting, ABA therapy with autistic children) and had “taught” in a daycare setting for the previous 8 months, but I have an undergraduate degree in Psychology not Education.  I did not have any formal training in education.  I only had a passion for children and a determination to succeed.  After a 3 hour interview and a 45-minute lesson plan, my former boss gave me a chance to teach Kindergarten.  Through my time spent with Blake Farm Dayschool, I taught Kindergarten for 3 years, a combined class of 1^st-2^nd for 3 years, mentored teachers, developed a preschool curriculum and for two years worked as the Educational Director for the Lower. All of this happened because my supervisor believed in me.  It was never a thought of mine prior to become a director, mentor, trainer etc.  She saw key leadership qualities within me and after two years, she started mentoring and training me for success.  Her constant support, insight, motivation and belief lead me to the Early Childhood Leadership program with Walden University.  The “job” I took as a kindergarten teacher turned into a “career” and ultimately a passion for early childhood education.   I believe “my calling” in life blossomed from the positive relationship I had with my boss. My goal is to own an educational preschool one day.  I know my goal will be reached in the future because of the relationship I developed with my boss and the partnerships I have with my husband, parents, and girlfriends.

Relationships have to develop and continue to develop throughout the duration of the relationship.  If the relationship does not continue to grow than more than likely it is over. Like I previously stated, you are not given a relationship.  Relationships take time to develop.  Key factors or common characteristics that have helped develop and sustain all of my important relationships (partnerships) are: trust, vulnerability, common interests, communication, mutual experiences, love and respect. I believe many of my relationships have blossomed because both parties shared a common interest.  Once the interest was established then communication and mutual experiences can develop.  Through these experiences and communications you develop trust, love and respect for the other person.  When you have trust, love and respect for someone you naturally become vulnerable through the process.  To me, being vulnerable is when your relationship turns into a partnership.  Vulnerability is the ultimate goal and glue to a partnership. Being vulnerable means you are not afraid to share your deepest feelings, thoughts, dreams, concerns, challenges, and desires in life.  You are not afraid because you trust the person to have your best interest at heart, no matter the situation.   You are not afraid to communicate and share experiences with them because you know the person loves and respects you.  All of the factors work together in building and maintaining a partnership.  You cannot have one factor without the other. A relationship may have some of the factors mentioned above or all of the factors but the factors are not as strong as in a partnership.  In order for two people to have a partnership, they need to have all of the factors present.

Relationships are a two-way street.  Both parties involved within the partnership must value and contribute the factors listed above equally.  If one party does not respect the other party as much, or if one party is not open to communication, being vulnerable, etc., than the relationship will have challenges and may ultimately decease. It is in our nature to protect ourselves. To be 100% vulnerable in a relationship is a rarity.  When I have experienced challenges or difficulties in my relationship, the challenge usually stems because one party is not being vulnerable. They are afraid to truly communicate their needs at that time. When both parties equally work on communicating, sharing interests, sharing experiences, trusting, respecting, loving and being vulnerable than it is easier to work through challenges and maintain a solid relationship.

Being a professional in the Early Childhood community is all about developing relationships.  As a professional you develop relationships with children, parents, programs, co-workers and the community.  If a relationship is not established than you have failed as an educator.  Developing a partnership with the child and the child’s family is when you will see the most success from the child. Having positive partnerships in my personal life allow me to understand what characteristics and factors are necessary to developing solid relationships in my professional life.  The factors that make positive relationships in my personal life are the same factors that will make positive relationships in my professional life.  There needs to be trust, respect, love, and communication within the relationship with the child, parent, community, and program in order for the relationship to develop successfully.  The common interests of the parties involved with the educator should be for the child to succeed. Everyone needs to equally work together on the factors to create the success for the child.