Saturday, February 1, 2014

Practicing Awareness of Microaggression



Practicing Awareness of Microaggressions

Microaggressions happen daily in our society.  Microaggressions can be made toward one’s gender, race, sexual orientation, ability or religion (Laureate Education, Inc., 2011).  Microaggressions are delivered by one consciously or unconsciously through multiple forms that cause damage to another person (Laureate Education, Inc., 2011).  Microaggressions come in three forms: microassaults (purposeful act), microinsults (demeans ones racial heritage), microinvalidations (invalidates ones experience) (Laureate Education, Inc., 2011).  

Studying microaggressions this week has brought me a new found awareness and alertness towards microaggressions. I hear them everywhere now; whether I am in a social setting with my friends, at work or watching the television.  It is astonishing how unaware individuals are with how often they offend someone or a make an “ism” comment.  Yesterday, my husband and I went out to dinner with a group of friends. One of our friends is an Asian male.  We were all discussing taxes and one of the white males at the table said to him “Hey, X, you can help me with my taxes, you are good with numbers and math, right?” The Asian male said, “Funny you say that, I was better at literature in school”.  The white male then proceeded to say “that cannot be, if you are Asian then it is in your blood”. The Asian male then gave a slight smile and replied with “yeah, yeah”.  It was obvious by the Asian’s response that he felt uncomfortable and offended by the comment.
The previous example is an example of a racial microaggression in the form of microinvalidation.  I do not believe the white male intentionally wanted to hurt the Asian male.  They are friends.  I believe the white male thought he was making a playful joke.  Most of the friends at the table laughed in response to the white male’s first comment regarding the taxes.  Once the Asian told him he was not good at math, the white male completely invalidated his feelings.  The white male totally disregarded the Asian male’s comment and told him he was wrong.  He then proceeded to lump the entire Asian population into one stereotype; “all Asians are good at math”.  He also insinuated that the Asian male could not identify himself as an “Asian” if he was not good at math.  Again, I do not believe the white male had any knowledge of what he was actually doing or what feelings he was actually creating within the Asian male.  

Being an observer of this scenario, I felt for the Asian male.  If the white male would have continued with one more comment, I would have stepped in and told him it was enough.  I debated whether to say something or not because I did not know how the Asian male would respond.  Would he feel even more belittled because someone else fought his battle?  Would he be more embarrassed because he was hoping no one caught on to his discomfort during the situation?  Would he be happy and grateful that someone finally realized these comments are hurtful?  I realized in this situation I have heard my friends make Asian stereotypes numerous times before toward him.  I honestly froze in the situation.  I observed the discomfort from the Asian male, which in turn made me feel uncomfortable.  

Overall, this experience brought the people’s feelings and thoughts that are discriminated against on a regular basis more into perspective.  Although, I was not the one receiving the microaggression, I immediately felt offended and uncomfortable when hearing the comments made.  It also caused me to think, how often do friends make other friends feel uncomfortable?  We are a group of friends who are supposed to care for one another and support one another.  However, we are throwing around racial stereotypes and forms of microaggressions toward one another.  It is alarming to think of…if a group of friends are doing this to each other, then how often do microaggressions occur between strangers?  

As a society we MUST be more conscious of our words and thoughts.  The saying, “think before you speak” is vital when conversing with others, especially if the others are culturally different than you. If everyone became a little more conscious of their comments, I believe we would live in a more peaceful world.

REFERENCE
 
Laureate Education, Inc. (Executive Producer). (2011). Microaggression in Everyday Life. (Video   webcast). Retrieved from    https://class.waldenu.edu/webapps/portal/frameset.jsp?tab_tab_group_id=_2_1&url=%2Fwebap      s%2Fblackboard%2Fexecute%2Flauncher%3Ftype%3DCourse%26id%3D_4211916_1%26url            3D 

4 comments:

  1. Great, great post. Your comments bring to mind the fact that so many people do not realize how they are hurting each other feelings when they are teasing their friends and making snide remarks. A lot of people perform microaggressive act against people who are their friends every day either by teasing them by their nationality, religion or sexual orientation. I can understand how you felt that you wanted to defend your friend, but I believe it would have made him feel either worse.

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  2. Great post I enjoyed reading it! I also agree with the comment above that a lot of friends are not aware of how teasing and knick picking can be microaggression.
    Great Post

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  3. I enjoyed reading your post and you provided very interesting information. I agree with you in your comment about to think before we speak. Sometimes people can very cruel and make very negative comments. Sometimes words hurt more than actions. I always tell my children if they have nothing nice to say not to say anything. Great post!!

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  4. You had some wonderful insights in this post. I really appreciated how you struggled with what to say when you felt your friend was displaying microaggressions. I can only imagine how uncomfortable you felt. I think I would have also struggled with whether I should step in or not. Thanks so much for sharing your experience.

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